Better "Dumb" than "Numb"

by Michael Sutherland

Imagine with me that you are filling a box... 📦 but not just a box but one that one day you will pass on to someone else. Imagine too, that it is a transparent box. Others will see the contents... This box is interactive too. People will experience the contents, maybe add or take from it.. As life goes on, you continue to fill this box. You would find that although you have a lot you want to put in the box- some things are not so important or maybe.. because of the size, shape or weight of the objects- the box cannot hold them. Maybe certain things should be placed first so that others can fit later? Or maybe you might want to fill it with certain items that you deem really important before others add things you don't think belong?

This box...

Is your child. Or your children. 👫

What are you filling your child with? What else is filling your child?

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I hear many parents (today) say- "My child is going to learn it some day- might as well be now" or "this is real life" or "real world", "I'm not going to water it down for them". What a bogus notion. Seriously... If we are thinking of this box analogy- you want your child to first have a childhood. They are innocent- sure they make mistakes and they can get annoying or just be downright bad- but they are immature (and sometimes ignorant) for a reason. If you are allowing them to see and live the world the same as you do, you are robbing them of their childhood and innocence and replacing it with knowledge (images and thoughts) that they cannot comprehend and in turn, this creates children who have anxiety, depression, shame and low self esteem. 

I come across needy children ALL the time that CRAVE love ♥ and attention 😳... and usually, I find that the way they talk and what they talk about- is beyond what they should know or have experienced. These poor kids that feel like they should be something that their bodies/minds know that they are not ready for. 

I'm sorry to say it, but...

Its not okay to allow your children to watch movies that are Rated R (or very often, not PG-13 either..)❌

Its not okay to allow your child, pre-teen or young teenager to have unlimited, unsupervised access to the internet. 💻

Its not okay to have adult-themed conversations around your children. 🚫

Its not okay to smoke and drink or do drugs around them. ⚠

Its not okay to allow your child to play hours of shooting & killing games. Ⓜ

Its not okay for you to allow your child to use foul language. 😱

Its not okay for your young girl to go to school or the mall or the skating rink with make-up and scarce clothing. 🚺

Its not okay for your young boy to stay glued to a screen. 🚹

I could go on.. but you understand what I am saying here...Yes? These things are not babysitters. You are not teaching them a lesson about the world. You are not preparing them for "the real world" 🌍 by allowing adult behaviors. Want me to prove I'm right? Think on this...

To rebel, 50 to 100 years ago, youth would smoke pot. Now its nothing for them to do X or meth or some pill concoction.

To "fight back" against the authorities, the youth would form rallies or get into fights and etc.. now they do shootings and bombings.

Girls would date the "bad guys" to rebel, now they purposely get pregnant by them.

Young guys would hang out on a corner with the fellas and pick fights with the other guys; now they join gangs where murder and larson are the initiations.

They have to 'step it up' nowadays because what was once deemed as rebellious or wrong, is now more acceptable.. and it wouldn't be rebelling if what they did was seen as acceptable.. 

We are numbing our children- making them more comfortable and accepting of the norms of the adults. So what will happen when they are adults? How will their children perceive the world- or better yet- how will they react to it? How will they rebel? 

Please... think about this parents. We need to focus less on our careers and our retirement and more on our youth! Easy and care-free parenting is a lie.. if its like that then you are doing it wrong. Bring back ethics. Make morals a priority. Knowledge and experience does not teach responsibility- obedience and limitations do. 🙈🙉🙊

This is not "the Christian way" or "traditional parenting".. I am not selling my personal parenting opinion to you. There is no "co-exist" notion here either- there aren't many good ways to do it. There's just RIGHT 👍and there's WRONG 👎. 

For the sake of this blog, I want to define the word "dumb" for you as I have used it in the title. To be dumb is to be without intelligence, knowledge or good judgement. Our children are certainly not without intelligence.. but they are meant to be without knowledge and good judgement- these things come with experience... it is better to be this way, than to be numb.. (without feeling) to mature things.  Social media, gaming, and technology (although useful) has a large hand at making this generation more introverted and is limiting their social skills. As a parent, you can counter this effect...

In this "box" 📦 we are filling.. let's not fill it with junk. Let's fill it with what we want to see used for the future. Let's fill it with what we want others to see in it. If you like the arts, then teach your kid about music 🎼 and theatre 🎬and art 🎨. If you are the athletic type, then teach your child agility🚴 or speed ⚽or strength training 🏊. Whatever you are good at or appreciate in the world- whatever you think is going to benefit our society and make your child happy- ALLOW your child to learn that! Put that in the box!

No matter which kind of parent you are. You can take something from this. Look at yourself.. look at your child.. I'm sure you've done a lot of good. What else can you do? The children- they deserve the best we can do. 😃

Michael Sutherland